I don’t know why

I don’t know why I carve attention so much, especially from guys. I just want to feel like I’m wanted in a way; it’s such an addicting feeling. It has ruined me so much. I don’t feel like I’m here living anymore. I’m just nothing because I’ve been used so many times, it has become normalcy for me. To be completely honest, I’m such a slut. I can’t believe I’m still talking to him, still carving him, still yearning for him to want me. It’s so pathetic but I can’t control this feeling that sits inside me. I wished I couldn’t feel at all. I wouldn’t be feeling all these emotions all the time just burning me from the inside.

I just want to lose my memory and start over. I want a blank slate.

trappedbetweenfandoms:

anarchoprincess:

j0ye:

I took this picture of Oli and myself today at the pool. After we got done swimming, we were walking home and had to pass by a group of cheerleaders that were practicing on my uni’s campus. One of the cheerleaders looked at Oliver and said, “She’s so cute!” With a smile on my face, I ruffled Oli’s hair and said, “HE.” as we continued walking past her. Immediately the girl winced, turned to her friend, and said, “Oh my god, she’s turning him gay..”
I am not turning my son gay by allowing him to express himself by wearing a floral dress. I’m so sick of people making comments that I’m altering my son’s sexual orientation or his gender identity because he’s wearing a dress. IT’S A DRESS. IT IS LITERALLY CLOTHING. If he is gay, that’s cool, I’ll accept him no matter what, and if he decides at any point he’s anything but a boy, I’ll still accept him (er, them/her). But allowing him to pick out his own clothes and taking him clothes shopping with me so he can pick out what he likes is not going to have ANY affect on his orientation/identity. The only concern I have about him wearing a dress is when he pulls it up to show me how big his tummy is in public, because I don’t want him showing a bunch of strangers his underwear.
If he was a little girl wearing a pair of shorts or a t-shirt with a dump truck on it, no one would say anything, because dressing as a boy is different. People see wearing a dress as a negative thing when you’re a boy, they say he’ll turn gay and that I’m a bad mom and I’m trying to turn him into a girl. But the bottom line is that him wearing a dress has nothing to do with being a boy or his orientation. If he’s gay, he’s gay. He’s too young to slap a sexuality on him at 3 and a half, and that’s not something I’m particularly worried about, because at this age he treats everybody the same and doesn’t have comprehension of what sexual/romantic attraction is. Wearing a dress has nothing to do with that.
He is a boy. He plays with dump trucks, rolls around in dirt, growls at everyone, and pretends to fart for fun. He also paints his nails, is obsessed with Sailor Moon, refers to himself as Princess Oliver, and yes, wears dresses. He is a boy.

best thing ever omg I’m crying you’re the perfect mother 

And the award for best mom goes to…

trappedbetweenfandoms:

anarchoprincess:

j0ye:

I took this picture of Oli and myself today at the pool. After we got done swimming, we were walking home and had to pass by a group of cheerleaders that were practicing on my uni’s campus. One of the cheerleaders looked at Oliver and said, “She’s so cute!” With a smile on my face, I ruffled Oli’s hair and said, “HE.” as we continued walking past her. Immediately the girl winced, turned to her friend, and said, “Oh my god, she’s turning him gay..”

I am not turning my son gay by allowing him to express himself by wearing a floral dress. I’m so sick of people making comments that I’m altering my son’s sexual orientation or his gender identity because he’s wearing a dress. IT’S A DRESS. IT IS LITERALLY CLOTHING. If he is gay, that’s cool, I’ll accept him no matter what, and if he decides at any point he’s anything but a boy, I’ll still accept him (er, them/her). But allowing him to pick out his own clothes and taking him clothes shopping with me so he can pick out what he likes is not going to have ANY affect on his orientation/identity. The only concern I have about him wearing a dress is when he pulls it up to show me how big his tummy is in public, because I don’t want him showing a bunch of strangers his underwear.

If he was a little girl wearing a pair of shorts or a t-shirt with a dump truck on it, no one would say anything, because dressing as a boy is different. People see wearing a dress as a negative thing when you’re a boy, they say he’ll turn gay and that I’m a bad mom and I’m trying to turn him into a girl. But the bottom line is that him wearing a dress has nothing to do with being a boy or his orientation. If he’s gay, he’s gay. He’s too young to slap a sexuality on him at 3 and a half, and that’s not something I’m particularly worried about, because at this age he treats everybody the same and doesn’t have comprehension of what sexual/romantic attraction is. Wearing a dress has nothing to do with that.

He is a boy. He plays with dump trucks, rolls around in dirt, growls at everyone, and pretends to fart for fun. He also paints his nails, is obsessed with Sailor Moon, refers to himself as Princess Oliver, and yes, wears dresses. He is a boy.

best thing ever omg I’m crying you’re the perfect mother 

And the award for best mom goes to…

(via my-beautifulnightmares)

manhatingfeminist:

More people are concerned with why women stay in abusive relationships than why men are abusing women

(Source: manhatinglesbian, via my-beautifulnightmares)

"I wish I was drunk"

Me always (via rafrica)

(via my-beautifulnightmares)

so-personal:

everything personal

so-personal:

everything personal

(Source: my-teen-quote, via my-beautifulnightmares)

"People don’t look at your personality first. People judge you automatically by your looks and then try to get to know your personality. But the second they don’t like your looks, they don’t get to know you. That’s how reality is."

Unknown (via amortizing)

(via my-beautifulnightmares)

stfusluht:

are you a farmer because you know how to raise cock

(via my-beautifulnightmares)

(via my-beautifulnightmares)

mattyhewhealy:

HQ

(via my-beautifulnightmares)

"Sometimes I just wanna fuck, and sometimes I wanna be in love, and sometimes I wanna be alone."

(via bl-ossomed)

(Source: hannibal914, via my-beautifulnightmares)

(via my-beautifulnightmares)

(Source: madness-of-depression, via my-beautifulnightmares)

"If you’ve been up all night and cried till you have no more tears left in you - you will know that there comes in the end a sort of quietness. You feel as if nothing was ever going to happen again."

C.S. Lewis, The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe (via feellng)

(via my-beautifulnightmares)

"I’ve mastered the art of pretending I have my life together when in reality, my shit hasn’t been more flawed than it is right now."

Dau Voire (via kushandwizdom)

(via my-beautifulnightmares)

"You still have a lot of time to make yourself be what you want."

S.E. Hinton, The Outsiders  (via cutely-perverted)

(Source: creatingaquietmind, via my-beautifulnightmares)